For When Being a Mom is Hard

Sometimes being a Mom is hard work. Ok, to be honest, it's hard MOST of the time. And sometimes I am REALLY bad at it. Last night was a good example of my lack of greatness in the parenting department.

I have one child to deal with. One sheet of math homework. It shouldn't be that hard, right? (How those of you with lots of kids make it through the night, I have no idea, but my hat is off to you!) The homework consisted of finding 3 labels from the kitchen and copying the measurements onto the worksheet and 2 practice problems, one addition and one subtraction. I am ashamed to say that this homework took nearly TWO HOURS to complete. There was yelling, crying, tantrum throwing, and walking away all involved. It was horrendus to say the least. We finally got it done. Fortunately for me, he must have been worn out from fighting about homework because he didn't give much resistance to the shower.

After he washed all of his anger down the drain in the shower, he came downstairs, cuddled next to me and in his little boy voice asked if we could start over. Of course, I cuddled him back, agreed and silently overflowed with thoughts of guilt and self-loathing. We talked a bit about how we both could have acted differently and then went to bed.

I often use a Bible app on my smartphone. So when I laid down in bed and opened the app it was on Isaiah 41 and the version was The Message. The title at the top? "Do you feel like a lowly worm?" How appropriate!?! That is pretty much exactly how I was feeling, except possibly lower. I'm supposed to be the grown up and I was acting just as childish as the 8 year old. I was feeling terrible and like a horrible mother. Afraid. Afraid of the impact my parenting is having on my precious son.

I read the chapter and then read it again in the NIV version.

Isaiah 41:9-10 (NIV)

⁹ I took you from the ends of the earth,
    from its farthest corners I called you.
I said, ‘You are my servant’;
    I have chosen you and have not rejected you.
¹⁰ So do not fear, for I am with you;
    do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
    I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Isaiah 41:14 (NIV)

Do not be afraid, you worm Jacob,
    little Israel, do not fear,
for I myself will help you,” declares the Lord,
    your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel.

 

God is so awesome. I love how He is there for us all the time. I don't even know why my bible app was in Isaiah as I was reading Romans last time I used it. But there it was. Exactly what I needed. Encouragement from the Father and a reminder that He is always there for me to lean on and ask for help.

 

I'm feeling much better about homework time tonight.