This week has been a tough one. I've got a place in my heart that I've been burying so deep that I forgot it was even there. God exposed it this week. He bared this place for me to see and for Him to heal. It hurts. A lot. Both the actual wound itself and the realization that it is causing me not to fully trust in Him. The wound is the loss of my husband to cancer. I truly thought that I was past the part where I didn't trust God for the best for me. But as it turns out, I'm still kind of upset that He didn't provide us the miracle that we prayed for so fervently. He revealed this to me on Sunday evening and every. single. day. this week He has been faithful to provide me with examples of why HE IS TRUSTWORTHY.
Times up. But I just wanted to share what He has been doing to bolster my trust. On Monday morning, through the Hello Mornings Abounding Hope Bible study of Job, He showed me that my suffering is not punishment. Seriously. This was so huge for me. Then yesterday we learned of God's tenderness. His tenderness. This isn't a quality I automatically attribute to God. He showed me that tenderness does not equal weakness and gave me a glimpse of the tenderness He feels. Then this morning we studied the armor of God and that He gives us everything we need in Him.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that He has more in store for me over the coming weeks as the Hello Morning email last Monday said that we would be studying Job and trust for the next 6 weeks!
It brings tears to my eyes to think of how He meets me in my place of weakness and hurt and heals my wounds. He waits patiently for me to be ready to accept his healing and grace. He is so faithful!
And I wonder why I have been so tired this week! :)
I'm linking up with Lisa-Jo today for Five Minute Friday.
1. Write for 5 minutes flat for pure unedited love of the written word.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. Go buck wild with encouragement for the five minuter who linked up before you.